Author Archives: A.Y. Marsh

2018 FIFA World Cup Predictions: The End

So, today the world will see just how badly Croatia slipped up by beating England in the semi-final. You see, it means England get to play in that glorious footballing institution that is the Third Place Play-off, while Croatia have … Continue reading

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2018 FIFA World Cup Predictions: Semi-Finals

And then there were four – remarkably, and delightfully, including England; now guaranteed our best performance in a World Cup since Italia 90, the tournament in which I came of age as a football fan. I have to admit that … Continue reading

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2018 FIFA World Cup Predictions: Quarter Finals

Thoroughly enjoyed watching the Three Lions saunter to an easy victory over Colombia last night – in no way were my nerves shredded at any point in the proceedings. Anyway, on we go to the last eight. Here’s how I … Continue reading

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2018 FIFA World Cup Predictions: Second Round

Well. My group stage predictions turned out to be not too shabby after all, correctly forecasting twelve of the sixteen teams to qualify. Of course, I got one thing spectacularly wrong (Germany!) – however, so did almost every other bastard … Continue reading

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World Cup Predictions: Russia 2018

So, having thoroughly disgraced myself with some of my predictions for last year’s domestic season, I decided to set myself up for yet more humiliation by trying to foretell how the greatest tournament of them all will pan out. Using … Continue reading

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Man Pretends to Look at Phone before Crossing Street

A British man paused by the side of the road and pretended to look at his phone on the way to work this morning, it has emerged. Matthew O’ Connor, a 31 year-old marketing specialist at Mobiles4U from Evesham, Worcestershire, … Continue reading

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Man Shoves Tomato Up His Arse

A British man has shoved a semi-ripe cherry tomato right up his bum for reasons that remain obscure, it has been confirmed. No further details are available at the time of going to press.

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